February 2003

I guess it's not a new game, but it's a revision of an old one, and not likely a new revision of an old one, so cancel all that stuff about it being a new game. Because it's not. But it certainly was a lot of fun. Kind of like a pillow fight is, only less messy. Or like running a race, only less... linear.

Although it wasn't quadrilateral either. It was somewhat... ovoid.

I suppose that it isn't that germane to the question at hand what shape the game is, but it is worth noting.

Enough of the rambling prologue--on with the action! (or, as the 'bonus footage' to the DVD edition of Monty Python and the Holy Grail says, "Get on with it!")

First, find about 12 friends. (As I write this, Naomi informs me that she is making up some pancakes from a 'just add water' mix. My sphere of influence is growing...) An even number of people works a little better.

Secondly, find a ping pong table, a ping pong ball, and enough paddles for each of you and your friends. It is good, although not absolutely required, to practice ping pong a little before commencing this exercise.

Arrange you and your friends, each clutching their own ping pong paddle (penhold grip recommended, but frying pan grip not unsuccessful) around a table in the following way:

I hear you saying, "That's not so much fun. After all, you only get to hit the ball every once in a while, and what if you miss? Should there be a penalty?"

This is the most beautiful part of this game. If you miss (either by overhitting the ball or missing a legally hit ball for returning) you are eliminated from the circular progression. Then the ball is served again, and the circle continues. Like playing ping pong musical chairs, really.

When the game progesses to 6, 5, 4, and 3 players remaining, there are some extraordinarily athletic and beautiful rallies which occur, if the skill level of the players is anywhere above rank beginner.

As I watched one of these rallies (having been eliminated earlier) I thought how incredible it was. As I participated in several, I can attest to how hard it is to run into place, focus your shot so that it doesn't go too hard (and float past the end of the table), then run to your place at the other end of the table. Verbal description fails me, but to experience this game is a must. When you get to 2 players and you have to serve to yourself or return your own service return, let's just say you learn finesse shots in a way never before thought possible.

Also, if you are not a ping pong pro, despair not! Many of the best shots were sheer flukes by people who weren't that good. It's simply a good, fun game, one which certainly gets the heart pumping and the adrenaline flowing.

If this game has not been previously described, then I would like to claim a copyright on it by the East District Lutheran Young Adults, the group of intrepid wayfarers with whom this game was experienced a couple weeks ago. My bruises have healed, but the pleasant memories of that athletic endeavour will not soon disappear.